Duct tape and cardboard, two of the indispensable tools used in the “There, I fixed it!”  Redneck Repair Manual was found being used at the Diamond Pet Foods plant in Gaston, South Carolina during an FDA inspection of the plant.

The Agency posted its shocking Investigational Observation report of the Diamond plant on the FDA website yesterday. And, boy, was it a doozie. Let’s just say crazy stupid is a pretty accurate description of how things are run inside that plant.

I mean, cardboard and duct tape? Really?

Anyone with half a brain knows there isn’t a chance in hell you can ever keep those materials clean and free of contaminants. Where did they get their food safety education – on the inside of a Double Bubble gum wrapper?

It boggles the mind that a company that holds the health of millions of pets in their hands would ever think of using the two most commonly seen tried and true items in any self-respecting dirtbag’s toolkit: duct tape and cardboard.

It goes without saying that their failure to follow basic levels of sanitation and to use good manufacturing practices was not only irresponsible, unethical, illegal and just plain sleazy, but through their incompetence they made some pets and people very, very ill.

In case this story didn’t meet your daily quota for Epic Fails, similar to the ones found in the FDA inspection report of Diamond’s plant, there are plenty more to be found on There, I fixed it! – a site that undoubtedly used Diamond Pet Food employees uses as their company’s operating manual.

But seriously, if it wasn’t so sad, it might almost be funny.